Ok so have really not done well on posting! My oldest furson Stevie was very sick! So was dealing with that. He is now on the mends! Then been busy with helping at the rescue & doing other foster duties! This is the first year that was able to help more at the cat rescue! Physically cant do much, but I can do more in the office! I like that I am using my brain more! For so long I felt so lost & just going through the motion of everyday life!

When I was in my 20s I worked full-time at the bank, was taking full time credits at Delta College to get my business degree, & during Christmas season would work part time at the Jewelry store. Working 75 hrs a week was norm & doing homework was just what I did. I also would go out on the weekend with my girlfriends & my boyfriend at the time, which he is now my amazing hubby! We would travel. I wanted to do & try everything! I modeled for many years & had so much fun! Jump out of a perfect airplane, went to Cedar Point so much & also did the Rip Cord alot! Adrenline rush has always been my thing, so when I got sick at 29, I never thought that it would be a fight for the rest of my life!

So what do you do when everything that you know just changes, & now your life is hospitals, tests & so much pain! Also Doctors telling you they dont know what is causing your pancreatic attacks or even my favorite “We cant help you, so dont come back” have heard that a few times! Also from drs that are best in their field I guess. Been to some of the best hospitals & still first 10 yrs would be continous fight! No answers, maybe some relief from the pain for a few months! The first 7 years of my chronic pancreatitis, i continued working at the bank! I loved my job, went to become assistant manager, did many tasks, made long time friends. By the time my illness won & i had to give up my job, the last 3 yrs or so I was parttime but still had the trust & knowledge of doing more then just a teller. So my manager would always give me more duties. I was greatful for how long they were able to keep me working. Cause everytime I did come back to work from an attack, I lasted maybe 3 or 4 months before my darn body would falter again & I would have another attack & be back into hospital. The same thing, IV fluids, pain management & nothing by mouth. Always had to rest pancreas! I have had several surgeries to see if anything would stop the attacks from happening. Stress was trigger & food too! I lived on liquids & soft diet. Till this day, not a fan of jello anymore lol!!

One of the first big surgeries I had was at U Of M, hospital! yr 2004, I had my pancreas duct rerouted to my stomach! It helped for awhile, was able to eat for awhile with no problem, great to eat foods. Even the reason I was able to work those last few years parttime. But it all came crashing down again! 2007 was one of the worst years! Will be the 2nd time my husband Mike & my mom were told that it wasnt good. Jan to April was in hospital in so much pain, couldnt even get out of bed. Only to use bathroom! Was on the lovely TPN bag of food by my pic line! Hate TPN bag! Anyway, by April my dr said we cant let her stay like this & he made arrangements for me to go to Mayo clinic (St Marys hospital) in Minn. Was in so much pain by time flight landed. The did an emergercy CT scan & found out my intestines would twisted & blocked around the pancreas. It was bad & had me rushed to surgery. I was crying so hard cuz Mike was at hotel getting settle in, didnt know these tests were being done. So anyway I had them call him cuz I wouldnt go till I saw him. So Mike had to run several blocks & try to find me in a hospital that is 10 times bigger then St Marys, michigan. He found me when they were taking me away cuz they said they couldnt wait. So im crying while they rolled me away & mike did his best not to have that complete fear look on his face but most of all I hated that he was alone. My mom just started a new job & wasnt able to make it to Mayo. Believe me it killed her not to be there. But I know Mike & her talked on the phone while I was under. I stayed at Mayo for about 2 wks. Saw crazy thing cross the hall! Also found out, if my Dr didnt step in, he wasnt my main while in hospital, it was a GI dr, I would of died with a month! I was a mess inside!

But Mike & I took it all in what was going on, new this was another fight we won! I wasnt going to let this illness destroy me! We got to see a high security prisoner come in the hospital across the hall! There were 3 arm guards all the time. 2 inside with the prisoner & one outside the door. We only got a glimpse of what was going on inside when a nurse would go inside. They had something set up so prisoner was always secure locked up. It was so bizarre to see! One day they brought him in! Then Mike & I woke up the next & somehow they snuck out in the middle of the night! Like that weird thing never happened. Those 2 days that the guards & prisoner were there was when Mike never went to the hotel, he was like I will stay here & sleep in this recliner lol!! Had a very sweet roommate. She had tummy issues too, she was already there a month when I came in. Felt bad that I was going home & she still was there. But she was hoping to go home soon! I have had some really amazing hospital roommates & then some weird ones & then ones that should have been locked up lol!! That will tell in another post!

But from this hospital stay for over 5 months, I lost my job for good! I was told I had to apply for Soc Security Disability! I cried again! I still dont feel Disabled, just dont fully function like everyone else. Saying the word Disability has so many bad feelings & people look at you different too. I have friends & family that see me sick! I hate that! I dont & will never see me that way! I am a fighter & want to live this life that now I know I was given to the fullest! I had to change how the think & even do somethings! But I have learned I am strong! I have learned who are my true supporters, & my friends & will always have my back for life! Dont see me broken! I am just the same crazy goofy Michelle. Just might take me longer to do somethings now! Never say I am a sick person or disable, I am a person who loves, laughs alot & doesnt deal with drama anymore!

I still love my adreline rushes, just have to choose which ones I can do now! I am always here for my family & friends cuz they have been here for me every step of the way! Here is to the adventures that are still to come!!!!